What to Wear on a Tropical Cruise
I’ve rather unexpectedly become a cruise entrepreneur - a career cruiser, you might say. I founded a comedy-and-music cruise called The Atlantic Ocean Comedy & Music Festival, and it’s brought hundreds of people like me - people who’d previously thought themselves more likely to read David Foster Wallace’s writing about cruises than go on one - out to sea. The benefits are many, like hanging out with awesome comics and great musicians, and enjoying unlimited free ice cream. The sartorial challenges, though, are significant. Here’s what I’ve learned.
Dress for formal night. On most cruise lines, one night of your voyage will be designated as a “formal night.” It’s essentially considered a dinner with the Captain, though the Captain doesn’t exactly sit at the head of a 2000-person table. On the relatively (though not extremely) high-end cruise line we use, they suggest black tie. I saw evening formal on women - dresses and gowns. On men, it ranged from real black tie to “my good polo shirt.” You’ll be able to get away with a suit, but honestly? Just go black tie. It’s fun, your date will appreciate it, and it’s nice to have a formal break from the swimsuits on deck. And if you want to do something fun, try a white dinner jacket, like the one I’m wearing above, in the middle of a dance circle that Dan Deacon threw me into last year.
Bring shoes for on-shore and shoes for the decks. You’ll be spending a lot of time in the ocean or a pool, so it’s a good idea to bring shoes appropriate for that purpose. Flip-flops are fine, but think about something a little classier, like leather sandals or espadrilles. They make a big difference. And if you are planning any excursions, remember to bring walking-appropriate shoes. I was glad I brought sneakers when I walked from the docks of Nassau out to the great food spots the ship’s comic told me about.
Bring two swimsuits. If you’ve got a swimsuit rotation, now’s the time to put it in effect. You’ll be in all kinds of water for the duration of your trip. Always good to have something dry when something’s wet.
Bring pants. Even in tropical places, night time is night time. Also: most cruise lines expect pants in the nicer dining rooms. So, unless you want to eat chicken fingers in the “4 Teenz Only” dining room, bring pants.
Keep your palette simple. Blue, white and khaki is a good one. Like any trip, it’s easiest to mix and match. You’ll be glad you brought clothes that are interchangeable through the course of your trip.
Linen is your friend. Linen wears lightly, looks good and dries quickly. A white linen shirt is an easy way to make shorts or a simple swimsuit look a little sophisticated.
Wear something nautical. My friend and colleague Lindsay wore a romper festooned with rope knots and anchors on last year’s cruise. I’m sure she’ll have something just as fun this year. When all’s said and done, it’s a vacation - so have some fun.
If you want to join me, a dozen amazing comics and twenty brilliant musicians at sea this summer, just visit boatparty.biz for more information on the Atlantic Ocean Comedy & Music Festival.

What to Wear on a Tropical Cruise

I’ve rather unexpectedly become a cruise entrepreneur - a career cruiser, you might say. I founded a comedy-and-music cruise called The Atlantic Ocean Comedy & Music Festival, and it’s brought hundreds of people like me - people who’d previously thought themselves more likely to read David Foster Wallace’s writing about cruises than go on one - out to sea. The benefits are many, like hanging out with awesome comics and great musicians, and enjoying unlimited free ice cream. The sartorial challenges, though, are significant. Here’s what I’ve learned.

  • Dress for formal night. On most cruise lines, one night of your voyage will be designated as a “formal night.” It’s essentially considered a dinner with the Captain, though the Captain doesn’t exactly sit at the head of a 2000-person table. On the relatively (though not extremely) high-end cruise line we use, they suggest black tie. I saw evening formal on women - dresses and gowns. On men, it ranged from real black tie to “my good polo shirt.” You’ll be able to get away with a suit, but honestly? Just go black tie. It’s fun, your date will appreciate it, and it’s nice to have a formal break from the swimsuits on deck. And if you want to do something fun, try a white dinner jacket, like the one I’m wearing above, in the middle of a dance circle that Dan Deacon threw me into last year.
  • Bring shoes for on-shore and shoes for the decks. You’ll be spending a lot of time in the ocean or a pool, so it’s a good idea to bring shoes appropriate for that purpose. Flip-flops are fine, but think about something a little classier, like leather sandals or espadrilles. They make a big difference. And if you are planning any excursions, remember to bring walking-appropriate shoes. I was glad I brought sneakers when I walked from the docks of Nassau out to the great food spots the ship’s comic told me about.
  • Bring two swimsuits. If you’ve got a swimsuit rotation, now’s the time to put it in effect. You’ll be in all kinds of water for the duration of your trip. Always good to have something dry when something’s wet.
  • Bring pants. Even in tropical places, night time is night time. Also: most cruise lines expect pants in the nicer dining rooms. So, unless you want to eat chicken fingers in the “4 Teenz Only” dining room, bring pants.
  • Keep your palette simple. Blue, white and khaki is a good one. Like any trip, it’s easiest to mix and match. You’ll be glad you brought clothes that are interchangeable through the course of your trip.
  • Linen is your friend. Linen wears lightly, looks good and dries quickly. A white linen shirt is an easy way to make shorts or a simple swimsuit look a little sophisticated.
  • Wear something nautical. My friend and colleague Lindsay wore a romper festooned with rope knots and anchors on last year’s cruise. I’m sure she’ll have something just as fun this year. When all’s said and done, it’s a vacation - so have some fun.

If you want to join me, a dozen amazing comics and twenty brilliant musicians at sea this summer, just visit boatparty.biz for more information on the Atlantic Ocean Comedy & Music Festival.

Regular readers may remember that in addition to publishing Put This On, I curate the annual Atlantic Ocean Comedy & Music Festival. It’s a long weekend in the Caribbean in July, and it’s also the most fun you can have on the entire planet Earth.

We’ve just announced our music lineup, and it’s totally amazing.

  • John Roderick of the Long Winters, singer and bon vivant, is your gregarious host.
  • Jean Grae, super-lyrical superstar, will grace the stage with favorites new and old.
  • LAKE, Olympia’s own indie pop mega-celebs, will be charming your socks off, and…
  • Antibalas, all 14(!) members, will be picking you up by the scruff of the neck and forcing you to party like a maniac all night long.

That’s in addition to a spectacular comedy lineup that features Nathasha Leggero, W. Kamau Bell, Kyle Kinane and more.

So: GET ON THE BOAT! Tickets are available now and selling fast. Grab yours here, now.

The Atlantic Ocean Comedy & Music Festival

This September, I’m putting on the biggest event of my life: the Atlantic Ocean Comedy & Music Festival. It’s a cruise to the Bahamas featuring an amazing lineup of music and comedy acts… on the music side we have Nellie McKay, John Darnielle of the Mountain Goats, Dan Deacon and John Roderick. On the comedy side, we have Marc Maron, John Hodgman, Nick Thune, Wyatt Cenac, Eugene Mirman, Jonah Ray and many more. Oh, and unlimited soft-serve ice cream.

The cruise (including a pre-party in Miami) runs September 12th-16th. Ticket sales end August 9th. So come join us for a certainly fun thing you will definitely want to do again.

Book your tickets now at BoatParty.biz.

I’m really excited and proud to share with you my latest project: The Atlantic Ocean Comedy & Music Festival. This September, I’ll be setting off from the port of Miami with some of my favorite entertainers and a few hundred of our closest friends and associates. We’ll have two nights of comedy, one of music, and four days of fun in the sun. Also: shuffleboard.
Our performers list is absolutely amazing. 
On the comedy side, we’ll have Al Madrigal and John Hodgman from The Daily Show, Marc Maron from WTF, Kurt & Kristen (that’s Kurt Braunohler and Kristen Schaal), Maria Bamford, and Eugene Mirman. Plus a couple of comics I think are amazing who you should know about: Jasper Redd, Hari Kondobalu, Josie Long and Nick Thune. Every one of these people is among the best in the business.
The music side might be even better. We’ve got John Darnielle of The Mountain Goats. We’ve got the charming and beautiful Nellie McKay. We’ve got John Roderick of the Long Winters. And the party will be set off right by the amazing, amazing Dan Deacon. This will be unbelievable.
Besides all that, this is a classy cruise ship, not some Carnival monstrosity. Bring your good clothes. And your valet, if you’ve got one.
You can book your berth now - and your hotel room for the pre-party in Miami. It’s all online at the awesome website boatparty.biz.

I’m really excited and proud to share with you my latest project: The Atlantic Ocean Comedy & Music Festival. This September, I’ll be setting off from the port of Miami with some of my favorite entertainers and a few hundred of our closest friends and associates. We’ll have two nights of comedy, one of music, and four days of fun in the sun. Also: shuffleboard.

Our performers list is absolutely amazing.

On the comedy side, we’ll have Al Madrigal and John Hodgman from The Daily Show, Marc Maron from WTF, Kurt & Kristen (that’s Kurt Braunohler and Kristen Schaal), Maria Bamford, and Eugene Mirman. Plus a couple of comics I think are amazing who you should know about: Jasper Redd, Hari Kondobalu, Josie Long and Nick Thune. Every one of these people is among the best in the business.

The music side might be even better. We’ve got John Darnielle of The Mountain Goats. We’ve got the charming and beautiful Nellie McKay. We’ve got John Roderick of the Long Winters. And the party will be set off right by the amazing, amazing Dan Deacon. This will be unbelievable.

Besides all that, this is a classy cruise ship, not some Carnival monstrosity. Bring your good clothes. And your valet, if you’ve got one.

You can book your berth now - and your hotel room for the pre-party in Miami. It’s all online at the awesome website boatparty.biz.

I just built this important website. You’ll have to trust me on this one.