The Slipnutz, featuring my pal Brian Stack and the great Andy Blitz and Jon Glaser, are reuniting February 1st at SF Sketchfest. They performed their signature song “We’re the Slipnutz” several times on Late Night with Conan O’Brien. It seemed the same every time, but they said the difference was that the first time their sweaters were polyester, the second time a cotton blend, and the third time, they went back to polyester.

So the moral of this story is: fiber content matters, folks.

The Trouble with Conan’s Suits

I’ve really loved watching the new Conan show on TBS. O’Brien himself is a brilliant comic mind, they’ve booked funny people rather than famous-for-nothing people with great regularity, and Andy Richter gets me every time. It’s a wonderful show. Conan’s also a very good looking man, and in remarkable shape. He is, in other words, a real winner.

I do, however, have one pet peeve: Conan’s suits.

The other guy in Conan’s time slot who’s worth your time, fellow Great Genius and Real American Hero David Letterman, has his suits made by Leonard Logsdale, perhaps the finest suitmaker in the United States. Letterman is a natural-born schlub, and you can see it in his loafers, white socks and open double-breasted jackets, but when his coat is closed, he always looks fantastic.

Contrast this with Conan.

One presumes that whoever is dressing Conan is trying for a sleek, urbane, contemporary look. Something that says cool and late night. They have the right idea, I think, but the details are sorely lacking.

Conan has favored dark, solid suits with a slim silhouette. Considering current fashion and Conan’s figure, I think that’s a great idea. I’m not crazy about the French blue shirts he’s chosen - I think they’re too dark, and make his pale complexion appear washed out. They do, however, highlight his eyes, so we’ll give him a pass on that.

The real issue is fit. Conan O’Brien seems to be going on stage each night in a suit that’s two sizes two small for him.

Take a look at the lapels on his suit. Lapels should lie flat across the chest when at rest. In fact, a mark of good tailoring is when they lie flat when the wear is in motion, too. Conan’s suit couldn’t be further from that ideal. Even with his arms down at his sides, you can see the pull lines radiating desperately from his button, and his lapels bowing like the mouth of a change purse.

Look at the way his the lapel leaps away from his collar towards the back of the neck. See how there’s a solid inch between the bottom of his shirt collar and the lapel of his coat? These are signs of an abysmal fit.

Let this be a lesson to you: slimmer is not always better. This kind of fit is unflattering and inelegant, even on a classy, shapely guy like Conan, and you should avoid it in your own life.

And to whoever dresses our boy Coco: I am here for you. I live 15 minutes away, and I’m willing to work for free. Let’s fix this.

After an offhand remark by Tim Gunn two nights ago that men’s jeggings exist, Conan O’Brien donned them for all of last night’s show.